When you were a kid, have you ever gone to school with an extra trouser? I used to because most of the days I returned home with a big hole in my back after playing slider at school. Having a safety pin and extra trouser are the risk mitigation plans advised by my father. My life was full of plan Bs.
After the first child, people used to have a second child as Plan B but I am (its very difficult.. just give me a second...)- ABCDEFGHI - "Plan I", the ninth child in my family. That is the real family planning... right? My father was a man of plans. He would always insist me to have alternate plans in my life. Though he taught me many good ones, the easiest one I can follow is to do family planning like my father because I am very good at (....Pause...) raising child. I can even beat my father reaching Z if someone is ready to sponsor.
I applied my father's advise to achieve my life's ambition - Love Marriage. When I was in 12th grade, I fell in love with a girl called Sumathi. My plan A was to try for a year and if it didn't work out, then my plan B was to settle in life and try again. One day, after school closing time, I reached the deserted street on her way home to handover the love letter. But that day it was unusually overcrowded. A group of boys was chatting and walking together. I overtook them and understood that all are following the same girl. When she turned left, everyone including me was turning left.
One of them started the conversation with me.
"Hey!, How dare you to follow our area girl?"
"No.. I am going to the hotel"
"There is no hotel here. In the end, there is one Pay and Use Toilet. Are you going to eat there?"
"Yes, NO... NO... My stomach is upset..."
"Hey! we are watching you daily...What is that paper?
Oh! Love letter!! So, daily you are going to that toilet to handover the letter to the grandma who cleans it.. right?
What is there inside?
Turmeric in four corners. Kottai kuppusamy thunai...
My Dear Balabharathi...HA HA.. Aahaaa, Are you that guy? Hey Guys, see this letter. He loves her father. He is not our competitor. Dummy piece... Come let's go! Hey!All the bestya...Haaahn... Hmmmm Enjoy!!"
I came to know through them that her full name is Sumathi Balabarathi and Balabharathi is her father's name. There was a big fight between them and my friends. Those guys screwed up my Plan A.
Now my plan B. After getting a job, I found another girl, Bharathi and somehow made her accept my love proposal. After four happy years, I went to her house to discuss about our marriage. The discussion turned into a heated argument and then into a big fight since they started beating her in front of me. We both rushed out of the house and ran to my bike. I was kicking, kicking and kicking but my bike didn't start. Bharathi whispered in my ear - "the whole flat is looking at us. Put the key and start... Man!!". We got married and I have been living with the same wife for the past twenty years. One day she asked me a question -
"I'm your second love, your plan b.. any plan C?". I replied that "This punishment is enough".. but her question made me realize that I can't have a backup for precious human relationships. What if she also thinks about alternate plans?
Marriage is irrevocable. Once done it is done. It's not like buying a shirt with the luxury of testing in a trial room or returning it if you don't like it. Whenever I see my father in law, it looks like he is laughing at me saying - "POOR BOY, STRICTLY NO RETURNS or REFUNDS...YOUR BUY ONE GET ONE FREE OFFER STILL REMAINS OPEN... "
"OH... HER SISTER? THANK YOU UNCLE, THIS IS ENOUGH". I have learned to love my wife and leading a happy life. I understood that a man can be the head of the family as long as his wife is the neck which controls the head. Let go of ego in human relationships and live a happy life.
------------------------------------------------ end ---------------------------------------------------
Friends, my wife's question about Plan C made me understand that I can't have a backup for precious human relationships. But there is a study that more than 50% of people are having a backup relationship called backburner relationship which is becoming a new culture through social media. Backburner relationship will burn your back. Before doing that mistake, just think for a second - what if your life partner also wants to have an alternate backup plan.
------------------------------------------------ end ---------------------------------------------------
Like every other family, we used to have intermittent fights. In one of the fights, she told that "I should have sensed the danger with inauspicious signals"
"What signal?"
"While leaving my house, your bike didn't start.."
"Hey! No bike will start without a key"
"You said that you are a Vegeterian. But in your house, they are eating whatever crawls, flies & swims except human beings.
"Yes, still I am a vegetarian"
"I'm your second love, your plan b.. any plan C?"
"No, this punishment is enough for me."
By all means, marry. If you get a good wife, you'll become happy; if you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher. - socrates.
When I was a kid, I asked my mom - "Mom, why you are not allowing me to sleep in the cot?"
"Hmm.. its raining daily night in your trouser.."
"Why are you always keeping an extra bedsheet and trouser?"
"That's Plan B if it rains"
"What if rain comes for the second time?"
"Hmm.. I will just remove the dress and bedsheet and leave you on the floor"
"Without dress?"
I still don't know whether she was deaf or dumb because I spoke with her only through her eyes.
As plan A, I handed over a love letter through my friend Pandiarajan since he studied with her in the evening tuition. Pandiarajan also had a lover in the same tuition called Sumathi. During the tuition closing time, Pandiarajan hastily placed the letter in the first page of the book. I was eagerly waiting outside on the road for more than 2 hours. "Come on man.. come fast!!" To my shock, there was a big fight between Pandiarajan and Sumathi. From the argument, I understood that Pandiarajan had wrongly placed the letter in his lover's book by overlooking the name.
"How dare you are to keep your friend's love letter in my book?"
"Sumadhi, that letter is for Sundarilĺp. Why you kept your book in Sundari's place? Both names are looking same." That is the last day Pandiarajan spoke with me.
Next Plan B. I planned to give the letter directly and followed her after school closing time. Only on that day I understood there was a huge crowd of local Romeos following her. They threatened me talking about the quota - "Hello, this is our area. we have high priority and eligibility." They foiled my first love.
When my friend tried to handover the letter during the tuition closing time, the tuition master caught him and read that letter. Immediately he asked everyone to go home, called her mother and handed over the letter to her mother. I still don't know why he gave the letter to her mother. After seeing the poetic words, he might have used the same letter as love letter to her mother replacing my name with his name.
Though my love proposal failed in class 12th, I didn't give up. I tried again after getting a job and my second love was a great success. Yes, at that time I thought that it was a success. The pitiest part of my story is - I married the same girl. In one of the marriage gifts, I saw a message "STRICTLY NO RETURNS or REFUNDS". I was not able to understand the meaning at that time but now whenever I see my father in law, it looks like he snickers at me saying - "OH POOR BOY.. STRICTLY NO RETURNS or REFUNDS.. DID YOU PUT ALL YOUR EFFORTS FOR THIS?". So key take away for the bachelors here is - there is no trial run for marriage. once done, we can't return or get a refund. So please don't celebrate too early without knowing whether you are a winner or a loser.
One day my mother asked to clean the tank with bleaching powder. After cleaning I got a lot of blisters in my right hand. That evening I met my lover and shown my hand.
"What happened to your hand?"
"Hmm.. I burnt my hand in a candle."
She cried and after some time asked me "Are you so serious? You will not leave me or marry any other girl.. right?"
"No. I will not. (I didn't tell it was my second love - my Plan B)"
"Are you vegeterian"
"Yes"
We both saw her brother running towards us. I was very tensed and imagining a lot - like he was going to stab me with a knife or going to thrash me with some tool.
I said "See... Bike is not starting.. we can discuss. Stop. Entire flat is looking."
He had thrown the bike key in my face and returned. Next day we did marriage in a road side Vinayagar temple near a registrar office. I felt like I reached the top of Mount Everest.
After a week we planned to change thali thread with gold chain. My wife wanted to change that in the same Vinayagar temple as she was so sentimental. But to our shock, the temple was removed by corporation while cleaning encroachments.
After the first child, people used to have a second child as Plan B but I am (its very difficult.. just give me a second...)- ABCDEFGHI - "Plan I", the ninth child in my family. That is the real family planning... right? My father was a man of plans. He would always insist me to have alternate plans in my life. Though he taught me many good ones, the easiest one I can follow is to do family planning like my father because I am very good at (....Pause...) raising child. I can even beat my father reaching Z if someone is ready to sponsor.
I applied my father's advise to achieve my life's ambition - Love Marriage. When I was in 12th grade, I fell in love with a girl called Sumathi. My plan A was to try for a year and if it didn't work out, then my plan B was to settle in life and try again. One day, after school closing time, I reached the deserted street on her way home to handover the love letter. But that day it was unusually overcrowded. A group of boys was chatting and walking together. I overtook them and understood that all are following the same girl. When she turned left, everyone including me was turning left.
One of them started the conversation with me.
"Hey!, How dare you to follow our area girl?"
"No.. I am going to the hotel"
"There is no hotel here. In the end, there is one Pay and Use Toilet. Are you going to eat there?"
"Yes, NO... NO... My stomach is upset..."
"Hey! we are watching you daily...What is that paper?
Oh! Love letter!! So, daily you are going to that toilet to handover the letter to the grandma who cleans it.. right?
What is there inside?
Turmeric in four corners. Kottai kuppusamy thunai...
My Dear Balabharathi...HA HA.. Aahaaa, Are you that guy? Hey Guys, see this letter. He loves her father. He is not our competitor. Dummy piece... Come let's go! Hey!All the bestya...Haaahn... Hmmmm Enjoy!!"
I came to know through them that her full name is Sumathi Balabarathi and Balabharathi is her father's name. There was a big fight between them and my friends. Those guys screwed up my Plan A.
Now my plan B. After getting a job, I found another girl, Bharathi and somehow made her accept my love proposal. After four happy years, I went to her house to discuss about our marriage. The discussion turned into a heated argument and then into a big fight since they started beating her in front of me. We both rushed out of the house and ran to my bike. I was kicking, kicking and kicking but my bike didn't start. Bharathi whispered in my ear - "the whole flat is looking at us. Put the key and start... Man!!". We got married and I have been living with the same wife for the past twenty years. One day she asked me a question -
"I'm your second love, your plan b.. any plan C?". I replied that "This punishment is enough".. but her question made me realize that I can't have a backup for precious human relationships. What if she also thinks about alternate plans?
Marriage is irrevocable. Once done it is done. It's not like buying a shirt with the luxury of testing in a trial room or returning it if you don't like it. Whenever I see my father in law, it looks like he is laughing at me saying - "POOR BOY, STRICTLY NO RETURNS or REFUNDS...YOUR BUY ONE GET ONE FREE OFFER STILL REMAINS OPEN... "
"OH... HER SISTER? THANK YOU UNCLE, THIS IS ENOUGH". I have learned to love my wife and leading a happy life. I understood that a man can be the head of the family as long as his wife is the neck which controls the head. Let go of ego in human relationships and live a happy life.
------------------------------------------------ end ---------------------------------------------------
Friends, my wife's question about Plan C made me understand that I can't have a backup for precious human relationships. But there is a study that more than 50% of people are having a backup relationship called backburner relationship which is becoming a new culture through social media. Backburner relationship will burn your back. Before doing that mistake, just think for a second - what if your life partner also wants to have an alternate backup plan.
------------------------------------------------ end ---------------------------------------------------
Like every other family, we used to have intermittent fights. In one of the fights, she told that "I should have sensed the danger with inauspicious signals"
"What signal?"
"While leaving my house, your bike didn't start.."
"Hey! No bike will start without a key"
"You said that you are a Vegeterian. But in your house, they are eating whatever crawls, flies & swims except human beings.
"Yes, still I am a vegetarian"
"I'm your second love, your plan b.. any plan C?"
"No, this punishment is enough for me."
By all means, marry. If you get a good wife, you'll become happy; if you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher. - socrates.
When I was a kid, I asked my mom - "Mom, why you are not allowing me to sleep in the cot?"
"Hmm.. its raining daily night in your trouser.."
"Why are you always keeping an extra bedsheet and trouser?"
"That's Plan B if it rains"
"What if rain comes for the second time?"
"Hmm.. I will just remove the dress and bedsheet and leave you on the floor"
"Without dress?"
I still don't know whether she was deaf or dumb because I spoke with her only through her eyes.
As plan A, I handed over a love letter through my friend Pandiarajan since he studied with her in the evening tuition. Pandiarajan also had a lover in the same tuition called Sumathi. During the tuition closing time, Pandiarajan hastily placed the letter in the first page of the book. I was eagerly waiting outside on the road for more than 2 hours. "Come on man.. come fast!!" To my shock, there was a big fight between Pandiarajan and Sumathi. From the argument, I understood that Pandiarajan had wrongly placed the letter in his lover's book by overlooking the name.
"How dare you are to keep your friend's love letter in my book?"
"Sumadhi, that letter is for Sundarilĺp. Why you kept your book in Sundari's place? Both names are looking same." That is the last day Pandiarajan spoke with me.
Next Plan B. I planned to give the letter directly and followed her after school closing time. Only on that day I understood there was a huge crowd of local Romeos following her. They threatened me talking about the quota - "Hello, this is our area. we have high priority and eligibility." They foiled my first love.
When my friend tried to handover the letter during the tuition closing time, the tuition master caught him and read that letter. Immediately he asked everyone to go home, called her mother and handed over the letter to her mother. I still don't know why he gave the letter to her mother. After seeing the poetic words, he might have used the same letter as love letter to her mother replacing my name with his name.
Though my love proposal failed in class 12th, I didn't give up. I tried again after getting a job and my second love was a great success. Yes, at that time I thought that it was a success. The pitiest part of my story is - I married the same girl. In one of the marriage gifts, I saw a message "STRICTLY NO RETURNS or REFUNDS". I was not able to understand the meaning at that time but now whenever I see my father in law, it looks like he snickers at me saying - "OH POOR BOY.. STRICTLY NO RETURNS or REFUNDS.. DID YOU PUT ALL YOUR EFFORTS FOR THIS?". So key take away for the bachelors here is - there is no trial run for marriage. once done, we can't return or get a refund. So please don't celebrate too early without knowing whether you are a winner or a loser.
One day my mother asked to clean the tank with bleaching powder. After cleaning I got a lot of blisters in my right hand. That evening I met my lover and shown my hand.
"What happened to your hand?"
"Hmm.. I burnt my hand in a candle."
She cried and after some time asked me "Are you so serious? You will not leave me or marry any other girl.. right?"
"No. I will not. (I didn't tell it was my second love - my Plan B)"
"Are you vegeterian"
"Yes"
We both saw her brother running towards us. I was very tensed and imagining a lot - like he was going to stab me with a knife or going to thrash me with some tool.
I said "See... Bike is not starting.. we can discuss. Stop. Entire flat is looking."
He had thrown the bike key in my face and returned. Next day we did marriage in a road side Vinayagar temple near a registrar office. I felt like I reached the top of Mount Everest.
After a week we planned to change thali thread with gold chain. My wife wanted to change that in the same Vinayagar temple as she was so sentimental. But to our shock, the temple was removed by corporation while cleaning encroachments.
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